Sunday, December 9, 2018

Ha! Here Comes the Welcome Wagon!


A while ago I made an off-color adult oriented suggestion involving late night driving on the expressway and - never mind.  I opined that since we didn't have any female readers here, I should just drop the whole business.

I was wrong.

Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Thanksgiving 2018: Day 4 - Shootout in the Back Forty

It was just at dusk, and I was sitting downstairs at the bar considering which cocktail to start my evening with, when Albert strolled in.

"Dad's gonna shoot some guy!"

Thursday, November 29, 2018

Hate Speech From the Feminazi Left

I have a first cousin once removed who we'll call TroubledClef.  He's a music major somewhere in the loony Left and will make his living by teaching music to the underprivileged but oh so talented public school children.  He's a senior and is just now realizing that starting a brand new career at twenty-something, with no experience, and $150,000 in school loan debt might be a bit of a bitch.

Thanksgiving 2018: Day 2

I spent the night at a Motel 6 in Mad City.  In the morning I got breakfast at Perkins Pancake House; waffle, scrambled eggs, sausage.  Absolutely delicious!  The people in Mad City are very nice, which is how I remember it.  Out of all the people I ever met in Mad City, I only found two, maybe three, whose absence would make the world a better place.  I'm very tempted to name them, but decorum and temporary sobriety cause me to decline.  One example of humanitarianism in Mad City I observed on my way out was the manager of Perkins Pancake House calling the police about a blonde woman who has been sleeping in her car in the parking lot.  The objection?  The blonde keeps
throwing her trash into the parking lot rather than the waste can.  The manager didn't care about her sleeping out there, just don't strew your garbage all over.  The blonde had been told, but never listens.

I hit the road and drive through Wisconsin.  What I'd really like to know is how the place ever got settled in the bad old days.  The terrain is beautiful, but the winters are harsh and the settlers had to clear land, build a cabin and a barn, plant stuff, get enough food to eat in the meantime, and chop enough firewood to survive the winter.  I wonder how many froze to death, or broke a leg or an arm and died, or died in childbirth, or whatever.  Clearly, a few survived.

I arrived at Shotgun Bob's around 1:30 PM, local time.  There are five dogs and two cats.  I plan to compile an inventory and post it.

Inspired by Glen Filthie - Shooting the .45-70


Inspired by Glen Filthie over at Filthie's Thunderbox - Ow!.

Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Thaksgiving 2018: Day 1

November 20th

I decided to go visit my brother, Shotgun Bob, this Thanksgiving.  I spent the previous two days cleaning the house and packing, and arranged for my Christian neighbor, Next-door Sandy, to feed and water Danté.  Big Mike was kind enough to stop in every few days and make sure the place hadn't burnt down, flooded out, or been burglarized in my absence.

Thursday, November 15, 2018

Quora Question: Lying, Cheating, and An End to It All

Today is your lucky day!  Here are three incredibly dumb Quora questions that I took the time to answer.  Maybe I should contact the local bird cage liner and offer a sane alternative to Damn Landers...


Friday, November 9, 2018

World War 2 War Heros: Joachim Rønneberg


Ex-Main Lady sent me a copy of her svensk nyhetsbrev (Swedish newsletter), which had an article about WWII Norwegian hero Joachim Holmboe Rønneberg who passed away October 21st, 2018.

Quora Question: What programs are being done to keep the children in rural and urban areas fit?


Another answer that's likely to be deleted. Well, here we go...

Monday, October 15, 2018

Widener's Revisited


About ten or more days ago (time flies when you're old and half in the bag most of the day), some enterprising ne'er-do-well offered me some cheese if I'd give them a free plug.  I really didn't think there was anything in it, but what the hell, right?  They offered a $25 gift certificate for a shameless commercial plug, and I snapped it up.  Well, I was a bit bored and it was after five o'clock eastern standard time.  What I expected was a gift certificate good for $25 off your order when you spend $250 or more, because why not?

But that's not what happened.

Thursday, October 4, 2018

Quora Question: What does it feel like to be shot with a .22 caliber firearm?

Much as I'd like to oblige this genius with a first hand experience, this could be a legitimate question from a somewhat morbidly curious 8 year old.  So on June 28, 2017, I posted an answer.

Commercial Message from Widener's

I got this in my email today.  I haven't read my email in a few days, so it's a bit out of date.  Still and all, the advertisement is supposed to earn me a $25 gift certificate - hey, who can't use $25 worth of ammo, right? - and a chance to win free ammunition for one year.  Whatever that may mean.

Here's a copy of the email Jacob sent me.

Tuesday, September 11, 2018

Quora Question: Will it be ok to become a dancer if I am a transgender man?


I would say no.  No, it isn’t acceptable to become a dancer if you are a transgender man.  I say this for two reasons:

1. Dancing is an art form that requires a lot of passion and self-expression. People who succeed at dance are invariably sensitive and emotionally brittle. They don’t bend, but they do tend to break easily.

2. The world in general isn’t ready for an artist like you. You’ll draw unreasonable criticism from critics who know little to nothing about dance, but who know a vulnerable target when they see one. Even with a solid emotional support network, you’ll be under severe emotional strain and it will affect your dancing.

Best of luck to you.

Monday, September 10, 2018

Fan Email

To: Old Acquaintance
From: Mad Jack

My dear Old,

I'm sorry, but I really can't remember you.  You say we first met at a dance competition in Columbus, or we danced together and got a first (place award) in Columbus?  Or are you trying to say that I was your first, and we were at a dance competition in Columbus?

My memory isn't what it should be.

Yours,

Mad Jack