Thursday, September 16, 2021

Shots Fired!

It was only a matter of time.

I live in the south-east corner of Columbus, Ohio, adjacent to a minor thoroughfare provincially named Machine Gun Alley.  From time to time I hear shots fired, and on New Years' Eve, promptly at midnight, the locals cut loose with a volley that sounded like the opening salvo for Civil War Two, or the War of Moonbat Agression.  I've also written about The Midnight Shooter, who I haven't heard from in a while.  I hope he's okay.

I'm digressing.  Continue as it amuses you to do so, with the usual warnings about politically insensitive opinions, facts, and racial stereotypes.

Last night about midnight I heard some idiot torch of seven shots in two groups; three, then four.  This morning around 11:00 AM EST I happened to look out my window and see Officer Friendly pulled up outside.  Now since Tyrone has been taken to the Happy House and incarcerated for an indeterminate time, I wonder what the actual fuck is going on with this fresh hell.

Turns out that someone, probably several someones, probably under the influence of one or more controlled substances, decided to drive the car and play with the gun collection.  And, in the name of fun, threw seven shots at my own little slice of heaven.

Two houses got hit; mine was not among them.  The cops dug one slug out of the wall, the bullet being jacketed and very well preserved, it could be used for ballistics.  I, acting on my own and being very civic minded, took a walk along the street and found three spent casings, which I collected.  I was careful not to get my fingers on them - I watch Law & Order and stuff, and so know how to do this.  I then called the CPD non-emergency number, told the powers that be what I had, and they promptly sent an older cop over to collect the evidence.  He seemed grateful, and told me that the cops do, occasionally, catch these guys.

In the meantime I'm thinking about a motion detector for my patio, which is enclosed by a high privacy fence.  I could also put some concertina across the top of the fence, and I sincerely doubt the Association would object.  They're all shaken up.

My bedroom is on the opposite side of the house that is exposed to the main road, which is a good thing.  I suppose I'll do nothing more than usual - until I hear shots fired, then I'm calling the CPD.



 


2 comments:

Glen Filthie said...

Absolutely. People are often amazed at how little effort and cost goes into securing their home. Get a sign in the window that says your premises are covered by a home alarm company. Aim the motion activated lights at the dark corners of your property. A couple other cheap warning signs put up will almost certainly deter the random predators that are looking for an easy kill. That really is all those guys are for the most part: lazy predators that aren’t that bright.

For the random urban sportsman that drinks and shoots under the influence, try and get a dresser and some furniture between your bed and the outer walls. That should stop everything except maybe the rifles and very large magnums.

Better yet… move somewhere less vibrant and diverse.

Mad Jack said...

My bedroom is furthest from the street. My scatter-gun is loaded.

Probably the only other thing to do is mount a few cameras in the area.