Maybe I'm too easily irritated, or maybe I'm a bit too intolerant. I don't think so, but then if I did think so I'd likely change my behavior, wouldn't I?
Rather than spend my time walking the disorganized aisles of my local supermarket and running into clouds of cheap perfume from fat ladies, I order online. I find online shopping cuts impulse buying to a bare minimum and is a whole lot less work than shopping in person. Another reason I shop online is the self-checkout system, put there for my convenience. I hate self-checkout. The alternative being a cashier, but these days most cashiers have an I.Q. about three points north of a box of rocks, and the if anything goes wrong they summon the special manager, who will, eventually, waddle over and fix whatever the hell it is that has flummoxed the cashier.
So I shop online for everything except produce.
Picking up my groceries requires a smart phone, which I don't have. I have a flip phone which does everything I want it to - namely make and receive phone calls. This means that instead of taking a photo of the icon in the parking lot, I call the store and inform them I'm here to pick up my groceries, which they acknowledge. This is where the migraine starts.
The day laborers that are assigned to grocery order delivery always have something wrong with them. Either they got dropped on their head too many times as an infant, or they're on some sort of medication (Thorazine?) or something, but these folks don't ride the same bus I do. Yesterday I got one who couldn't talk, which is not unusual.
He walks up to the car and stands a respectable distance away.
"rumidjck?"
"I affirm that I am, indeed, Mad Jack."
"uanuminatnk"
"Just load my groceries in the trunk."
"uanuminatnk"
"I can't understand what you're saying."
"uanuminatnk"
"I still can't understand you. What is it you want?"
"uanuminatnk"
"Nope, not one word. Load my groceries in the trunk."
After a few more tries his English cleared up to the point where I could understand that the store was sold out of boneless, skinless, chicken thighs. I sighed.
"Fine. Load the groceries in the trunk," I said, fuming. Once loaded, I drove over to Giant Eagle and shopped inside. Sure enough, the cashier was mentally damaged in some way. Fortunately nothing went sideways - but I had trouble understanding her as well.
Why won't the store hire people who speak English?
5 comments:
Because no one makes them speak English anymore. Hell; they don't even need to pledge allegiance to the flag when they "naturalize" anymore!
"Why won't the store hire people who speak English?"
'cause that would be rayciss.
You could always shop at Laurie's Wal-Mart. Ft Wayne is just a day trip away. But you might wanna do it on Sundays, because the rest of her schedule is 2nd shift...
Pete: I actually called a co-worker on that once. In the middle of a business meeting, I told him, "Look Alfredo, lose the accent. You don't handle it well, and people can't understand you."
No response. He was something of an egotistical jerk anyway.
Sailor: I've concluded that I'm racist. I'm biased in favor of the white Angelo-Saxon protestant white race, and proud of it.
CW: Sundays it is. What time do church services start?
At https://live.emmanuelcommunity.org/ 6pm Saturday, 9 and 11 Sunday!
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