Cancer: Week 7 Day 3

I woke up yesterday afternoon and discovered that I've lost my voice.  I cannot talk at all; only whisper.  I'm told this is an expected side effect of the radiation therapy.

The skin on my neck and throat is burned and the nausea continues.  I can't eat anything without becoming nauseous, and the medication for nausea is not all that helpful.  The only real cure is time. I'm supposed to consume 2000 calories per day; I'm doing good to eat 1100.  Yesterday I managed about 1800 or so, which took a Herculean effort on my part.

Cancer: Week 7, Day 1

Seven weeks of treatment.  My final radiological treatment is one week from Tuesday (tomorrow); my final chemo treatment is this Thursday.  Then I'm done with therapy and things will get worse for three weeks.

Nausea comes in waves.  I've never been so sick in my life. 

Cancer and Rock Bottom

Last night, Wednesday, I hit rock bottom.  My digestive tract was malfunctioning in ways I couldn't believe were possible.  Nausea came in waves, accentuated by a spike in my fever.  I was so miserable I wanted to die.  Why should I live through this?  I couldn't come up with a good reason, but the effort of assembling myself, my pistol and a conveniently private place where my remains would be guaranteed to be discovered by the authorities was just too much effort.  So here I am.

Cancer, Week 6

I'm still alive.  My dietician tells me I'm not eating enough, which is probably true, so this week is going to be food week.  The problem is that my mouth is so dry that anything resembling a bread product is automatically rejected.  My sense of taste is, for all intents and purposes, gone.  Everything tastes like low-grade sawdust.  My energy level is down, which isn't helping.

The team on the radiology side have got their act together and are handling their set of side effects very well, meaning my pain level is easily tolerable.  The chemo side has been a different matter up until I switched oncologists; I picked the one the nurses feared, respected and universally disliked.  I met him and consider him a good, regular type guy who happens to be a whole lot smarter than everyone else.  Question: how would you handle it if the people you were forced to work with were all retards?  Let me amend that question: how do you handle it?  Because we've all been there, right?

This morning things aren't too awful bad.  We'll see how the day shakes out.

One good thing is that I no longer need Lorazepam (Ativan) to get through my radiology treatment.  I'm happy with that.

Status Update

I'm too sick to write.  Most of the medical staff tell me I'm doing real good.  One reminded me they never said this would be easy.

Thank You

My sincere thanks to everyone who has prayed for me or who has left a comment.  You have no idea what a line or two of encouragement means, so I'll tell you: The lift is enormous.

Still Alive

To those who can't tell from the next post, I'm still alive.  I'm sick as a dog, but I'm alive and I am not giving up.  For one thing, there's all those anti-freedom moonbats out there who would celebrate my demise - and I'm not going to give them the satisfaction.

English As Our Official Language

What's the problem with making English the official language of the United States?  This comes up every few years and every time it does, the media is flooded by moonbats who rant, rave and screed about racial prejudice and other bad things.  You know what?  I no longer care.

Keep reading for my own somewhat profane rant.  Warning: politically incorrect.

My Condition

Don't get your hopes up; I'm still alive.  My treatment begins in the next 10 days, and will consist of both radiation therapy and chemo therapy.  The primary treatment is radiation, which will happen five time a week for seven weeks.  The chemo therapy, which uses Cisplatin, is used to kill whatever squamous cells the radiation therapy breaks loose and that try to take up residence in another part of my body.  Think of this as bayoneting the wounded.

At the terminus of my last meeting with my treatment team, my doctor told me in all seriousness that in terms of undesirable side effects, this particular regimen was the toughest they had to offer.  In his entire career he's only seen two men continue working at their regular job all the way through treatment.

I don't intend to set any records, but neither do I intend to wimp out.  I'm going to get through this and come out the other side just as grouchy and ill-tempered as ever.

Still on Hiatus...

Pick one letter out of the alphabet.  Hint: it's the one between B and D.  Okay, you in the back of the class, get your hooter out of that girlie mag and pay attention.

C.

That's the letter, and that's what I've got.

Back to School!

Well, the brilliant minds that comprise the Sylvania Board Bored of Education have just cost the hoi polloi a bundle of money.  Keep reading for my somewhat disjointed rant about our elected officials and our no-fault system of government.

On Hiatus

I'm taking a leave of absence for a few months due to poor health.  I'll resume blogging with a vengeance in a month or two.  Keep reading for the details as it amuses you to do so.

Congratulations!

My sincere congratulations along with a hoist of the morning bourbon glass and a tip of the old fedora to Sollecks, law enforcement officer extraordinaire, and his wife Mrs. Sollecks without whom this event would not be possible.

Sollecks is the brand new father of a baby boy.

For those of you who don't know the players, Sollecks provided me with a police ride along which I wrote about in Cops: My Ride Along. He is an excellent police officer and will be a great father.

Restaurant Review: Hot Pot & Asian Grill

Hot Pot and Asian Grill

4038 Talmadge Rd.; Toledo, OH

Mon - Thu: 11:00 am - 10:00 pm; Fri: 11:00 am - 11:00 pm

Sat: 12:00 pm - 11:00 pm; Sun: 12:00 pm - 9:00 pm

Phone: (419)214-0600

Facebook Page - Hot Pot and Asian Grill

Northeast corner at Talmadge and Sylvania

The Toledo Blade did a review of the Hot Pot Grill, which I will not link to here.  The restaurant reviewer didn't know what she was talking about, mainly because of her worldly experience (none), which was inversely proportional to her attitude - if the food doesn't look like a burger and fries, then what's it doing on my plate?  I couldn't let that one slide, so this afternoon I went over to see for myself.  Keep reading to get the straight money story on the Hot Pot and Asian Grill, and why people would want to eat there.

Sylvania Ohio Busybodies

I am, generally speaking, a live and let live sort of person.  I take pains to avoid irritating my neighbors.  I don't play loud music, I stay off their property and I don't get into loud, extended brannigans with friends and relatives at 3:00 AM (otherwise known as three in the damned morning) that involve the local constabulary.  I don't make comments about the length of my neighbor's lawn and wonder aloud if he's ever going to get off his dead ass and cut it. I don't offer him beer or wine in an effort to be friendly and sell him my current political agenda.  I figure the poor bastard has enough problems of his own.  I know I do.

Likewise, I expect the same from him.  I've found that most people will let me alone, excepting a few minutes of casual conversation now and again.  The only help from my neighbors that I would ever hope for is for them to call the fire department should my house ever catch fire, and if they see some low-life breaking into the house they might call the police and deliver an anonymous tip.  I don't expect them to ding the intruder while he's halfway in through the window.  For one thing, it might be me, as I've been known to lock myself out upon occasion.

This, then, is how good neighbors ought to act, and if we all did this, we'd all get along just fine.  We don't, but that's a topic for another day.  What happens in the middle of this pastoral scene is government.  Federal, State and Local, every single branch is populated with people who are convinced that they can run your life better than you can.  The city of Sylvania, Ohio is no exception.  Keep reading for the latest regulation to float to the surface.

Toledo Police Officers Falsely Accused of Racial Profiling

Back in April Toledo City Councilman Larry Sykes was stopped for a traffic violation by Officer Derek Cranford and Officer David Sprott of the Toledo Police.  If you believe Larry Sykes there was no reason for the stop, and in fact since Councilman Larry Sykes knew he wasn't doing anything wrong, he took his time pulling over.

The officer tapped on the driver's side window, startling Larry Sykes, who rolled down the window and cooperated fully with the officers.  The police officer asked the councilman where he was coming from, where he was going and if he had any weapons, liquor or drugs in the car.  The officer told Mr. Sykes that the reason for the stop was that the rear license plate was difficult to read, which prompted councilman Sykes to reply that it was probably dirty. The officer forced councilman Sykes to wait while the officer checked Mr. Sykes's license for any outstanding warrants, which took about 20 minutes.  Finding no warrants, Mr. Sykes license was returned to him and he was allowed to go on his way.

No citations were issued.

Toledo City Councilman Larry Sykes believed he was the victim of racial profiling, so he wrote a letter to the chief of police alleging police misconduct and abuse of authority.  The department of internal affairs started (and completed) a high priority, extremely thorough investigation into the matter.  Smelling offal in the water, the Toledo Blade started their own investigation.

That's when Toledo City Councilman Larry Sykes's story started falling apart like a cardboard box in a monsoon rainstorm.

This Sucks Pond Scum

On Wednesday I get a call from someone I've never met informing me that an old friend just passed away of a heart attack.  I've known PartyMan for about 40 years, and although we'd lose track of each other from time to time we'd eventually make contact again.  About five years ago PartyMan called me up because he needed money.  I sent him three bills, and he paid me back several years later, with interest.

Five years back PartyMan calls me and says he's been to see the sawbones, mainly because he was too sick to walk to the bar.  So the sawbones runs a bunch of tests, and delivers the news.  And it isn't good.

Bad News: PartyMan has cancer.
Good News: It's cancer of the kidney, and it's operable.  So, with a little snick-snack-chop, PartyMan will be cancer free and all that implies.
Bad News: At some point in the past, PartyMan suffered a heart attack.  His heart is at 60% efficiency, and if there were any choice at all the sawbones would not take a knife to him, because, well, PartyMan is not a good bet.  PartyMan has no memory of suffering a heart attack, and that should tell everyone a little something about PartyMan.

PartyMan needed money for medication and to live on during recovery.  He asked me for $150 and I gave him $300 with the stipulation that:

• He understands that the money does not come from me, it comes from the Lord.  Were it up to me, things would be a little different.
• He would not spend the bread on liquor or other recreational substances.

And that was that.  So PartyMan survived the surgery, recovered and paid me back with a little interest.  Like I said, that was five years ago.  Since that time PartyMan went on disability and got inside a Section 8 apartment in a building downtown.  About a week ago last Wednesday he dialed 9-1-1 and the paramedics found him inside the apartment.  He'd stopped breathing.  He was comatose.

So they got him going again and took him to Saint V's in Toledo (Ohio), where he was hooked up to various machines that kept him breathing.  He lasted about a week and never regained consciousness.

In the meantime some people, whoever does these things, managed to find and contact a living relative (the dead relatives are ignoring the whole business), and PartyMan's brother and sister showed up to clean up the mess.  One way or another, they discovered Yours Truly, and I became involved.

I started calling people we both knew and discovered that another old friend, SunnyGirl, that I hadn't seen in a while was also deceased.  She had a four line obituary in the local rag and that was that.  No other information, not even the names of survivors.

Then I called a mutual friend, Big Daddy Fastbucks, and when I couldn't raise him I started to wonder just what was going on.  He finally called me back, and that's a relief.  He's doing well.

PartyMan was 60 years old.  SunnyGirl was 71.  Seventy-one doesn't seem all that old to me, but I guess it isn't the age so much as it is the mileage.

I caught myself making a list of dead friends, associates and casual acquaintances.  I think I'm depressed.

Mother's Day is this Sunday.  I think I'm going to work extra hard at giving my own dear mother a very nice Mother's Day.

The Death Penalty and Vindication

My Internet buddy Jeff Gamso over at Gamso - For the Defense is against the death penalty.  So am I, generally speaking, mainly because we've all seen the results of our government in action in many other areas and We the People are willing to believe that Our Government would never send an innocent man to the gallows, or to prison, or pretty much anything else that could be construed as a gross miscarriage of justice.

Just how gullible are we, anyway?

May 6, 2014 ballot: Victory!

Here's a message to the Sylvania Board of Education from me, Mad Jack.

You Lose!

From The Blade: Unofficial Results of the May 6, 2014 Election as of 5/7/2014 9:02 a.m.

Sylvania schools 3.8-mill continuing permanent new tax levy for operating expenses
Votes
FOR              4,357
AGAINST     4,864


We the people, the Great Unwashed, the hoi polloi, the commoners that you and your ilk look down upon from the dizzying heights of your ivory towers, we've had enough of you and your demands for more, more and still more!  You're nothing but a bunch of chazzers.  You've been eating at the public trough for so long that you don't fly straight anymore.

In spite of you and your best efforts, your demand for more money failed.  Now we'll get to live in Sylvania Township for a while longer, no thanks to you.

Cinco de Mayo 2014

Happy Cinco de Mayo!  On this day back in 1862 the Mexican army kicked the snot out of the French army in Puebla, Mexico.  Contrary to popular belief, this is not about Mexico's independence.  This is about celebrating the culture of Mexico.

The Mexican war for independence started with Grito de Dolores (Shout of Dolores) on September 16th, 1810 and ended 11 years later on September 27th, 1821.

May 6, 2014 ballot: Sylvania School Lawbreakers

A few days ago I wrote about the upcoming election.  You can read about it at May 6, 2014 ballot: We're Broke, or not as it amuses you to do so.  Since then the arrogant administrators that comprise the Sylvania Board of Education (BOE) have given raises to a host of school employees, all of whom make well over the median household income (2011) of $58,720 per year, and about three times the estimated per capita income (2011) of $31,187.  Additionally, all these people enjoy full teacher benefits, retirement and perquisites.

Ask yourself if a person could live on $58,720 per year, then look at what we are paying these people and decide if they truly need a raise.

As published by the Toledo Blade on Tuesday, 4/29/2014: Sylvania School Board Approves New 3-Year Employment Contracts

Southview High School's athletic director Susie Felver, whose salary increased $4,757 to $90,314
So now we're paying a gym teacher $90 grand? WTF?!

Director of disability services Michalene Sujaritchan, who got a $5,483 raise to $104,113
Just what does a director of disability services do, anyway? I mean besides suck up money from the public trough.

Assistant principal at Northview High School, Kasey Vans, whose new $88,761 salary includes a $4,681 raise.
$88 grand for an assistant principal? What are they, nuts? What did Vans do to deserve a raise, anyway? Besides show up for work everyday. Here's a few more, again from The Blade.

Employees whose contracts were renewed for three years and their salaries are:
Joseph Shamy, food service director, $78,391
Julie Sanford, assistant curriculum director, $88,761
Amanda Ogren, assistant principal at McCord Junior High School, $87,881
David McMurray, Southview High School principal, $110,403
Chad Kolebuck, Hill View Elementary School principal, $96,371
Karen Hehl, Timberstone Junior High School assistant principal, $87,881
Darren Estelle, assistant director of information technology, $90,926
Edward Eding, Maplewood Elementary School principal, $96,371
Jeremy Bauer, Stranahan Elementary School principal, $96,371
Michael Bader, Timberstone Junior High School principal, $104,113
Alan Bacho, director of facilities, $104,113

Director of facilities, over $100 grand. For what? Fire Bacho and let the assistant principals do his job. The seem to make about as much.

This is why the Sylvania BOE is demanding more money. They spend money that doesn't belong to them like there's no tomorrow.

Keep reading, because here's the best part.

Chris Myers over at SwampBubbles posted this on Tuesday, April 29th. It seems that members of the Sylvania school system are using school resources paid for by our tax dollars to promote the new levy they don't need.  As Chris points out, this is in violation of Ohio law.  Here's a link to the article and another to the Ohio law.

SwampBubbles: Is Sylvania schools using district resources to promote the levy? The answer is yes, the question should be to what extent?

LAW Writer® Ohio Laws and Rules: 3315.07 Instructional program for employees - supplies and equipment for local school districts.

(C)
(1) Except as otherwise provided in division (C)(2) of this section, no board of education shall use public funds to support or oppose the passage of a school levy or bond issue or to compensate any school district employee for time spent on any activity intended to influence the outcome of a school levy or bond issue election.

Chris bases his accusations on email that he, personally, received from the Sylvania school system and that he displays on SwampBubbles.

This is a brand new low, even for the Sylvania BOE.  Hand out raises, demand more money from the taxpayer and use school resources to promote the tax levy.  Typical politicians.

Being Railroaded, Part II

First and foremost, here's a hoist of the bourbon glass and a tip of the old fedora to Bud Love, owner of Power Recruiting in Toledo, Ohio.  Should you have need of his services, you'll find him at:

Bud Love
Power Recruiting
6029 Renaissance Place
Toledo, OH 43623
(419) 720-8708

Reading through the local bird cage liner, what should my bleary, red-rimmed eyes fall upon but a local dog story.  Well now, would you look at this. I wrote about this last month here, in Being Railroaded. Tickets can be a bit expensive.

May 6, 2014 ballot: We're Broke

Times are tough all over according to the Sylvania Board of Education.  The Sylvania school system needs more money.  A lot more.  There's only one place to get that money, and that's from property owners in the school district.  Never mind that we're already over-taxed.  What matters is the school system, because it's for the children.

This all came about because of greed and the path of least resistance.  Greed, because if you're on the Board of Education your job is easier and a lot more enjoyable if you can fund some kind of program without cutting the funding for something else.  That way, everyone with their own personal agenda is satisfied and the board members will get re-elected next term.  This dovetails nicely into the path of least resistance because it's a whole lot easier to explain why the school system has no choice but to put another levy on the ballot rather than cut unnecessary services and eliminate extraneous personnel.

It's tough to get solid information about school funding and this levy, but I've found some.  In an article from the Toledo Blade, Sylvania Schools Levy Supporters To Greet Voters At Polls

According to the article, the school system has recruited volunteers to greet the voters and encourage these people to support this brand new levy, which is a 3.8 mill continual-operating levy.  That means that once it's voted in, we can't get rid of it.  There is absolutely no way to get a levy revoked.

What voters don't realize is that up until recently, the State of Ohio was picking up a portion of those property taxes, but as of July 2013 that activity is discontinued.

From the Toledo Blade on Monday, 7/29/2013:

Ohio Cancels Property Tax Rollback - Existing Levies To Get Funding Break, But New Ones Will Not

Many Ohioans didn't realize the state was picking up as much as 12.5 percent of their local property tax bills, one Senate Republican recently said.

Which is very likely the truth.  Most people get sick when they write that check for property tax.  How many taxpayers would take the time to see how the amount is calculated and if it's correct?  Not many, I'm thinking.

Local governments and schools heading for the ballot in November to ask voters to support new or replacement levies will have to tell them that the price tags attached will be higher than they were previously told. The taxpayer will pay the entire tab for any new taxes approved.

Which is only partially true.  Up until I found this article, I hadn't been aware of that particular circumstance.  All I'd heard was the usual mantra about needing more money and how none of this was the BOE's fault.  It was the Federal government, the State, the economy, the falling property values... anything but uncontrolled, irresponsible school spending.  At the root of this is the State of Ohio making cuts to education - except that it isn't.

The recently passed [Ohio State] budget contains $717 million more in basic per-pupil subsidies for K-12 schools over the next two years...

The State of Ohio is continuing to subsidize K-12 education.  That includes Sylvania.

One item that is never spoken of, and I kind of think might be the dirty little secret that the Sylvania Board of Education wants to suppress is the current tax rate.  Information on this is hard to find, but what I did manage to find is worth reading. From the Toledo Blade on Monday, 1/27/2014:

Auditor Gets Sylvania Tax Measure - Schools To Seek Additional $4.9 Million Levy To Avoid Deficit In ’16

The article states that the school system doesn't need the money right this instant, which is what they would have us believe.  No, they say they need the additional money to avoid a deficit in 2016.  In plain English, they say if they don't get more money now, right now, in 2016 they'll be spending more money than they are taking in.  Running in the red, so to speak.  To my way of thinking, this gives them two years to decide just which expenses they'll cut back on.

So how much are we taxed right now?  According to the article:

The Sylvania schools now collect 44.98 mills of operating levies, all continuing.

Compare that to the measly 3.8 mills they are asking for now, and it doesn't seem like much.  It's only an increase of 8.44%, but that's how levies work.  Just increase the tax a little at a time and maybe no one will notice.  Until they try to buy groceries, that is.

We've been through this entire business before.  Again, according to the article:

Its most recent new levies were 4.9 mills each, passed in 2004 and 2011.

Just three years ago a new levy barely passed, and they had to hold a special election to do it.  That levy was supposed to 'stabilize everything', according to the school board.  But now they're back again, asking for more money.

So how much will a property owner be paying?  If your property is worth $100,000.00, you'll be writing the Sylvania school system a check for $4,878.00, and because the State of Ohio is no longer covering a part of your property tax, you'll be paying the entire amount.

There is still a significant portion of retired people in Sylvania, or people who have moved here and are not wealthy.  An extra $5,000 a year goes a long way towards a nice life.  You can forget that, though, and it's because of the school system.  They don't care if you're poor, if you're retired or laid off or have other expense.  Their attitude: Too bad.  Pay me.  Just be thankful I'm not asking for more.

My family has lived in Sylvania for over 50 years, but it's getting to the point where we are being taxed out of our own home, and we're being forced out by an elite cadre of elected officials who don't give one final damn whether we stay or leave, so long as their hog trough is full.

If you would like to write these people and share your views on lower taxes and responsible government, here's a list of email addresses:

Sylvania Board of Education

Jim Nusbaum, President
jnusbaum@sylvaniaschools.org

Julie Hoffman, Vice President
jhoffman@sylvaniaschools.org

David Spiess
dspiess@hotmail.com

Vicki Donovan Lyle
vlyle@sylvaniaschools.org

Stephen Rothschild
srothschild@sylvaniaschools.org

Sylvania Township Trustees

John Crandall
jcrandall@sylvaniatownship.com

John Jennewine
jjennewine@sylvaniatownship.com

Neal Mahoney
nmahoney@sylvaniatownship.com

All three turncoats trustees have publicly supported the new school levy, I suppose because it means more money for the government.  Never mind the constituents that have to live with it.  They'll get along just fine.

The real truth is that if this levy fails two things will happen.  One, there will be a special election held at a time when voter turnout opposing the levy is likely to be very low.  Two, there will not be any change in the performance of the Sylvania school system.  Of course you can't convince the school board of that, but it's true none-the-less.

Vote no.  Tell them that they've got enough money already, and that they can learn to live within their means.  Like the rest of us.

So Long to XP

Well, today is the day.  My OpSys is officially orphaned, kicked to the curb and treated like last week's fish wrap.  I'm not worried, nor do I intend to upgrade to anything else.  I've got several layers of protection and I perform regular back ups of my data.

While I'm usually against all forms of government regulation, this might be one area where the government should get involved.  If the Federal Government could rise to the level of mediocrity, that is.  The government might consider forcing Microsoft to support XP for another 10 years or so, but given the past performance of the government... I don't think so.

Being Railroaded

On the morning of May 2, 2013, on her farm in Lambertville, Michigan, Stephanie Sonnenberg swears that she saw two dogs kill two show pigs inside her barn.  Sonnenberg says one dog attacked her, but she was able to defend herself with a wooden board and overpower the dog, holding it for animal control.  One dog is a husky, weighing in at 60 pounds.  The other is a husky mix, weighing about 30 pounds.  The two pigs weigh approximately 100 pounds each.  The two dogs are owned by Janni Juhasz who resides just across the border in Ohio.

By Michigan law, the dogs must be destroyed and Sonnenberg must be compensated for her loss.  Sonnenberg claims the pigs were worth $45,000, or about $225 per pound.  Another source states that Sonnenberg was offered $9,000 ($45 per pound) and turned it down.  These appear to be pretty expensive show pigs.

The first time I read about this insanity I wrote it off as just another filler for the birdcage liner, but then I got to thinking.  Pigs are tough customers and have an irascible disposition.  They are not anything close to Arnold from Green Acres.  If the dogs actually did mix it up with the pigs, why aren't the dogs all torn up?  As it turns out, I'm not the only one asking that question.  Keep reading to see the latest news.

Hines Farm to Reopen

Thumbing through the local bird cage liner, I fat-fingered the keyboard and discovered the following:

Historical blues club to reopen
From the article in The Blade:

The original owners, Frank and Sarah Hines, died in the 1970s and Henry Griffin, who grew up near Hines Farm, bought the property in 1978 and patiently worked to restore it over the years.
He continued to host occasional blues concerts in the club, and a yearly blues festival in an adjacent outdoor venue called the Pavilion until his death in January, 2013.
Steve Coleman, the new owner of Griffin Hines Farm, said he knows rumors have been swirling about the legendary blues club near Swanton since his father, Henry Griffin, died more than a year ago.

Steve says he's going to reopen Hines Farm and have it operating by this spring.  There's more information on the web site: Griffin Hines Farm

I like Hines Farm and I intend to make their very first show.  I'm hungry for ribs, whiskey and blues. I wrote about Hines Farm several times.  Here, in The eagle flies... and another article here, Griffin's Hines Farm Blues Club - Revisited. There are plenty of photos so you can get a feel for the place.

Here's a hoist of the morning bourbon glass and a tip of the old fedora to Steve for getting the place open and running again. Here's how!

Stand Your Ground and The Bully Pulpit

One way or another I stumbled across Lethal Lessons from Florida, a post on a blog by Jeff Gerritt and sponsored by the local bird cage liner.  For a solid explanation of stand-your-ground law, read Much Confusion Around Both Stand-Your-Ground and Castle Doctrine by Andrew F. Branca.

I wrote a brief response which will probably last until the censors see it, and so was inspired to write a more lengthy response here.  Keep reading to find out why I disagree with Jeff and his anti-freedom agenda.

Foster Care and Violence

You may remember that my brother, Shotgun Bob, has a houseful of critters to include three or four dogs and an equal number of cats.  He also has a wife, The Girl, and a son, Albert.  You'd think this would be enough to satisfy, but The Girl wanted to stay in the foster care business (Albert is the result of foster care) so Shotgun Bob acquiesced for reasons I neither know nor care about.  The latest foster care child is a 13 year old boy we'll call Dim.

Things went along pretty smoothly for six months or so, then yesterday Shotgun Bob found out just what had been living in his house.

Robert Burns Dinner 2014 - The Review

I first attended a Robert Burns dinner in 2012; I wrote about it here: Robert Burns Dinner in Review. The Burns Dinner is held at Barley's Ale House, an excellent restaurant which I reviewed here: Restaurant Review: Barley's Ale House No. 2.

Somehow or other, and I'm not sure just how this happened, we missed the Robert Burns dinner in 2013.  I know - heresy,  heresy, devil worship, witchcraft, no new taxes and other unspeakable perversions.  To which I say: Bite me.  I made it this year, and to atone for this incredible faux pas I'm posting a much longer review than I'd planned, along with interesting pictures of a few notable guests and staff.

Keep reading to see what you missed at the Fifteenth Annual Robert Burns Dinner and find out why you should attend next year.

Robert Burns Dinner 2014 - Hospitality

I would be sorely remiss if I failed to thank my brother Big Mike for his excellent hospitality.  Should you ever be so fortunate as to be a guest at Big Mike's house, know that he feels a great deal of responsibility for your personal comfort.

Keep reading for a few highlights and photos.

Robert Burns Dinner 2014 - Road Trip

On Friday afternoon I packed my bag, put my car under me and headed South on US 23 with a great deal of enthusiasm and anticipation of an excellent weekend.  I was going to enjoy three days of my brother Big Mike's hospitality and the Robert Burns Dinner at Barley's.

Keep reading for a restaurant review and general highlights.

Another Government Screw Up

On February 12, 1989 Dennis McGuire killed Joy Stewart and her unborn baby.  On Thursday, January 16, 2014 McGuire was executed by lethal injection.  By all accounts McGuire spent about 14 years in the justice system, ended up on the go to Jesus cart with a needle in his arm and took 25 minutes to expire noisily from a botched execution.

The citizens of Ohio should be marching on the State Capitol with torches and pitchforks, tar and feathers and effigies of every single elected weasel in State government.  They aren't, and here's why along with a nice diatribe on why they should.

Pain, Sweat and Hose Draggers

If you think being a fireman (firefighter? fireperson?) is anything close to easy, here's a post that is required reading for you: Pain, Sweat and Grunts. The author is a retired fireman and has produced a very high quality photo essay about one training session involving the fire department and Pops, a bigger dummy than I am.

Well, a dumber dummy anyway.  Do yourself a favor and read this one.

Pain, Sweat and Grunts by Schmoe

Curtis Reeves and Chad Oulson Shooting

Curtis Reeves is charged with second degree murder in the shooting death of Chad Oulson.  You can read all about this story in any number of places.  Here's one that better than most - From CNN: Dad'S Texting to Daughter Sparks Argument, Fatal Shooting in Movie Theater, By Steve Almasy.

People are astounded by this, and in retrospect, arm chair quarterbacking it all the way, I'm not.  Keep reading to find out why, with the usual foul language warning coupled with a standard politically incorrect and unpopular opinion disclaimer.

Snow Crises - January 2014

We've had a big snow and now we're getting below zero temperatures. Here are a few photos I took along with some commentary about our stupid local government.

Happy New Year! Happy 2014!

Happy new year to everyone reading this. I'm staying in this year, New Year's Eve being the original amateur night and the police being serious about this drunk driving business. In my younger days I used to go out and tear it up pretty good on New Year's Eve. Then I started doing the hotel room package deal, which worked out real well. These days I just don't feel up to screwing around with a roomful of obnoxious drunks. Here's a tip of the old Fedora and a hoist of the happy hour bourbon glass to all the people who have to work tonight. I hope you all have a real boring shift, but I'm guessing you won't. Please stay safe out there while you're dealing with the drunks, family squabbles and house fires. Thanks for your service. See you all in 2014.

Robert Burns Dinner 2014

Pay attention, sit up and stop mumbling.  Two years ago Big Mike, Lash and I attended the Scottish event of the year in Columbus, Ohio.  I wrote about it here, in the Robert Burns Dinner in Review. Well, it's on again. Check the official website at Robert Burns Dinner, read my review if you want to know what to expect, then plan to attend the event at the Smoke House and have a roaring good time. Big Mike and I will be there, Lord willing and the creek don't rise.

Merry Christmas

Yeah, that's right.  Christmas.  Not 'Happy Holidays' or any of that other happy horseshit.  Keep reading for a politically incorrect view of Christmas and a recipe for egg nog that will flatten all but the professional drunkard.

Playing Doctor - Nursie for Real - Update

For the gory details, see my previous post.  Meantime, here's the straight skinny on what really happened during the six hour delay.

Playing Doctor - Nursie For Real

It seems that Flopsy (Main Lady's eldest Little Darling) came down with the crud, the major symptom being the digestive tract threatening to issue the last meal a return to sender combined with quality control issues in what is delicately labeled as the lower tract.  This started about two weeks before turkey day, and it got so bad that on Monday before T-Day Flopsy went off to the sawbones.  Keep reading for medical outrage.

Albert is Suspended

You may recall that my brother, Shotgun Bob and his wife now have a son, an 11 year old boy named Albert.  The kid is bright, but doesn't have the patience for problem solving.  He gives up too easily.  When Shotgun Bob got him as a foster child, the public school system advised all concerned that Albert was ADD, ADHD and a classic PITA.  The State, in its infinite wisdom, put Albert on some kind of drug cocktail designed to calm him down while increasing his love of all things feminine.

Once adopted, the medication officially ceased.  When Albert becomes too rambunctious he and the dog pack get turned outside to amuse themselves on Shotgun Bob's six or eight acres that includes a dense forest.  Albert wears himself out and turns up about supper time unless he's cadging a meal at the neighbor's house.  Daily chores can be problematical, but if Shotgun Bob is working on some kind of project, like building fence or putting a roof on the shed, Albert is right there with him.  He thinks it's fun to work with Shotgun Bob, you see.  And I guess it is if you're an energetic eleven year old boy.  For one thing you get to belt stuff with a hammer, and if you get dirty no one cares.

I guess Albert was in school a week or so ago, standing around the classroom talking to some other little boy, when Suzy Smartypants walked up to the duo and, pointing at each boy in turn, proclaimed in a loud voice that, "You're a dweeb and you're a geek."  To which Albert replied, "What's that you're wearing?  A unibrow?"

Completely devastated by this unwarranted verbal attack, Suzy burst into tears.  She was immediately surrounded by a protective circle of her symbolic litter mates who murmured words of comfort interspersed with howls for vengeance justice to be visited upon Albert and his cadre of future oppressors.  The local authority figure sallied forth and after quieting Susie's hysterics, escorted Albert to the principal's office where he was suspended for three days.  Susie is undergoing therapy - not electroshock therapy, which is too bad, but regular old therapy.

Back in the old days when something like this happened the participants were told to sit down and be quiet, and that was the end of the matter.

Shotgun Bob managed not to laugh out loud when he heard about the whole business.  His only thoughts on the matter revolve around the fact that all authority figures concerned are female, and all are black.  He wonders how much discrimination is involved here.  Which, frankly, I wonder about as well.

Meantime the family came up for Thanksgiving and we took Albert out to the gun range.  I have a Smith and Wesson .22 revolver that he's able to shoot, and he turned in a respectable score.  More importantly he didn't violate any of the four rules of gun safety, nor did he cause any adults nearby to flinch.

The holiday went pretty smoothly.  I refused to allow Shotgun Bob's wife to get under my skin, even when I caught her going through Mom's china and picking out the pieces she wanted to have after Mom dies.  I think that's a bit much, but maybe that's just me.

Oh well.  I hope everyone reading this had a happy Thanksgiving holiday.

Sylvania Township Trustee Election 2013 - Unofficial Results

The unofficial election results are in, and unless something completely unforeseen happens here's how things shake out for Sylvania Township.  As usual, there's good news and bad news.

Read on, with an obligatory profanity warning

Police Shooting: Erick Gelhaus and Andy Lopez

It's happened again.  I was holding off on this one to see what the FBI investigation comes up with, but Peter Grant wrote about it here, Bayou Renaissance Man: The lynch mobs are out again, and he's defending the police officer with a vengeance. 

Keep reading to see my take on the whole deal.

Another Execution, Another Government Screw-Up

Some Moonbat somewhere came up with the phrase, 'it takes a village'.  I can't remember just who it was.  It could have been Hitlery, but it might have been that talking head that looks like 300 pounds of bear liver in a plastic bag.  You know, what's-her-name.  What I'm leading up to is that to really screw things up, and I'm talking big time screw ups that start with a brain storming session in some baby kisser's office and move right through the initial design, the safety and regulatory modifications, then pick up a few more screw ups from the joy-boys in the advertising agency who are supposed to tell the Great Unwashed just how valuable and new and shiny and better and exciting this thing is, well... for that kind of gargantuan screw up, it takes a government.

Want proof?  They've done it again.  If you keep reading and if you're 18 or under, be aware that your mother will not approve of the language or ideas you'll find below the fold.

Sylvania Township Trustee Election - Write Your Candidate!

One thing you can always count on.  If you are fortunate enough to ever be able to speak directly to your elected official (at any level) you can bet your bankroll against a plugged nickel that it's close to election time.  Otherwise, we're supposed to shut up and take it, unless we're applauding whatever latest fiasco our fearless leader is spending our tax dollars on.  I could go on in this vein for another thousand words or more, but what's the point?

It's about two weeks until election time, and if you want to write your potential Sylvania Township Trustee and as a few pertinent questions, now's your chance.  What - don't have his email?  Ah... how about that.  Here are a few of the email addresses for your candidates - those without an email address can be contacted through their website:

Sylvania Township Trustee Election - 2013

Up for reelection are Haddad and Jennewine. I wrote a warm, sensitive but somewhat lengthy piece on the election and was about to post it, but then I fat fingered the keyboard and lost the whole business. Oh well. Here's the summary:

Penny Levine, D (Moonbat)
No. Not just no, but hell no. I've written about Levine before, and in two years neither of us have changed. The woman is crude and authoritative. She wants to raise taxes, enact new tax levies and she favors the elimination of the township in favor of a city. She refuses to get involved in the Internet because putting anything in writing can come back to bite you later on. Anyone is better than Levine.

John Jennewine, I (Moonbats won't have him and Wingnuts kicked him out)
Yes. Incumbent Jennewine hasn't done much for government, but that's a good thing. The man knows enough to think things through carefully and he seems to be pretty well organized. He hasn't destroyed anything, and if he has any fault at all it's that he's failed to hand Haddad a haymaker to snot locker when Haddad started up with him.

John Jennewine has been keeping his eye and business acumen on the major projects in Sylvania, such as the construction of a new fire house, and is doing his best to bring this one in under budget. That means that:
1. He's showing responsibility. It took me a minute to realize this, as so few politicians show real responsibility these days.
2. He's guaranteed to get right under the thin skin of every Moonbat within payoff distance. Keeping an eye on the money means a whole lot less of it will get wasted, which pisses off the Moonbats.

Don Miller, R (Wingnut In Name Only)
Yes, and I'd vote for him twice. Miller favors separation of city and township; he opposes annexation of township land by the city. More importantly, Miller is a successful business owner who believes in raising tax money by attracting more successful businesses to the area. This is a very refreshing outlook.

Miller is that very rare commodity that should be seized before he wises up and refuses to get involved in politics: he's an honest, intelligent politico. My only reservation about Miller is that he's inexperienced and has solid, well-reasoned ideas about the best way for the Township to grow. As such he'll be opposed for no logical reason, he'll get shouted down at meetings and Haddad will call him names. If he can hold on to his temper and exert some patience, Miller could make a real difference.

John H. Crandall, D (Moonbat)
No. Crandall is over 70 years old and favors increased taxation, increased government authority and truly believes that the township should be eliminated in favor of one big city government - with John Crandall in the driver's seat. If you want someone else to run your life for you, there are better options than Crandall.

Kevin Haddad, I (Moonbat Without A Clue)
No. Incumbent Haddad is the same old Haddad that wouldn't get off the garbage collection jag until he attended a Township meeting and a group of residents hung him in effigy. He's got the tenacity of a Lake Erie catfish and a Levine-esque love of government oversight - especially with Haddad at the wheel. Want to end up in the ditch? Vote for Haddad.

For my comments about Levine, see Toledo Talk: Sylvania Township Trustee Election, 2011 and November Election Results and Ruminations - 2011.

I'll be posting more later on, including a few websites where the candidates can make their platform and priorities known to The Great Unwashed.

Thank A Police Officer Day 2013

Today is Thank A Police Officer Day; Saturday, September 21, 2013.  Today I'm ignoring the bad behavior of a few and thanking the rest of the department for their service.

I live in Sylvania Township, Ohio which is not to be confused with the city of Sylvania.  We in the township have our own police department, which is comprised of the best officers East of the Mississippi and North of the Mason-Dixon line.  My thanks to the Sylvania Township Police Department for doing an outstanding job.  I've written about the Sylvania Township police on other occasions; here are two:Late Breaking News: Major Electric Blackout Averted and Sylvania Township Police.

We live next door to the city of Sylvania, and in fact Main Lady is served by the Sylvania PD.  Sylvania did an outstanding job for us which I related here: Hit and Run. I'll never forget seeing this abandoned car in Main Lady's front yard and wondering (aloud) what I was going to do.  The officer replied cheerfully that they'd be glad to tow it out of there for me, which lifted a huge weight off my shoulders.  Between the Township and the City they caught the driver, who was hammered beyond coherent thought and who claimed a neck injury and so went to the hospital for a butt load of pain killers rather than a medium sized set of lumps and an extended stay in the drunk tank.  The court system let the offender go, by the way.  If I didn't know better, I'd say there was some kind of job security conspiracy going on between the judge, the lawyers and the cops.  You guys bust 'em, we'll prosecute and defend 'em, and the judge will let 'em go.  They're bound to screw up again, and you guys can bust 'em.

How real does some of that sound to the cops out there?

Finally I come to the Toledo Police Department, which I wrote about in My Ride Along. Suffice to say that I saw them in action and these officers turned in an absolutely stellar performance when they assisted a mentally ill woman.  Thanks to their kindness and consideration these two officers really turned her day around for her.

So then, this is my thanks to all you police officers out there.  You show up every single day for work and hope for a nice, quiet day.  Every time you interact with the public you make someone's life just a little better, and every once in a while you get the chance to make a huge difference in someone's life.

My sincere thanks, a tip of the old fedora and a hoist of my afternoon bourbon glass.

Here's how!

Rant: Taxes, Fire and Police

What do I get for my tax dollars?  In my case, not a whole helluva lot.  I'm sick and tired of being overtaxed and not getting anything in return.  I'd like to see some politician put a few questions on the ballot sometime about how our tax dollars get spent and how we, the great unwashed, would like to see the same dollars spent.  I'll bet it would be forty below in Hell before the government ever did anything like that again.

Keep reading for a Class 'A' rant.  Caution: This post contains offensive language and sedition.

Saturday Shoot

A friend of mine whom I will refer to as Executive Mendicant suggested we go to the range on Saturday and put some lead in the air.  Well then, who am I to be anti-copacetic?  Keep reading to see the range results (you'll feel better about yourself) and a review of the Smith and Wesson Airweight.

Where's the Dirt?

I'm kind of wondering just who is dirtier - politicians or commercial media.  I'm thinking it depends on the day and the players.

Consider that Representative Monique D. Davis (D) 27th District recently made an inflammatory comment on AM radio that is being taken as far out of context as liability lawsuits will allow, and maybe a little further if the alleged perpetrator in question is one of the numerous non-profit organizations catering to a protected category of people.

But before I get started I'm going to set the stage, and I'd like you, the reader, to indulge me a minute and read this next paragraph carefully.

Imagine you're in Chicago.  The notorious Big Windy.  Imagine you have a nice, big feather pillow.  Go to the very top of the Willis Tower (AKA Sears Tower) first thing in the morning on a day with a nice breeze blowing.  Stand on the roof, lean over the railing and rip the pillow open.  Shake all the feathers out of the pillow and watch the wind distribute those feathers all over Chicago.

That's how a rumor starts.

Now what I'd like you to do is go collect up the feathers, every last one, and put them back into the pillow.

That's what it takes to quash a rumor.

Keep reading for an informative, well-written rant about police, commercial media and several sterling examples of just what is wrong with commercial media and government today.

Restaurant Review: Pho Viet Nam

I don't have the spelling quite right on this one.  The 'o' in Pho stays mainly in the snow is a lower case oh with a tiny question mark hovering over it and what appears to be a small accent mark to the right.  I can't find the letter anywhere, and I'm probably not pronouncing it right anyway.

Pho' Viet Nam

3636 Upton Ave.; Toledo, OH 43613

Open 7 Days a Week

10:00 AM to 10:00 PM

(419) 720-2952

Pho Viet Nam

This place is a real diamond in the rough, and once word spreads you'll have to wait in line to get in.  As it is, the crowd is still a little sparse during lunch.  Keep reading to get the low down news on Pho.

Flower Photos - July 21, 2013

Whenever I'm at a loss to write something I find myself posting photos. Well, I've got several ideas for controversial posts, but I haven't written these philosophical contributions to civilization as we know it as yet. While everyone is patiently waiting for a definition of the universe and nine examples, here are a few flower photos I took while ambulating around Main Lady's front yard and enjoying my early afternoon bourbon.

Hey pal, wanna buy a city?

For anyone who gives a tinker's damn, the city of Detroit, Michigan has filed for bankruptcy.  You can read all about this situation in about eighty bazillion places on the Internet, but at the end of the day they all say the same thing: The city of Detroit is dead broke and in hock right up past the tallest smoke stack in Detroit - which hasn't been contributing to air pollution since 1973.

Once we find a solution for air pollution, we discover we can't afford it.  Go figure, right?  No one except the members of the Detroit city council needed a crystal ball to find out Detroit was in severe financial trouble, and has been in trouble for years.  The proverbial icing on the cake was when Kwame Kilpatrick was elected Mayor of Detroit.  Kwame was (and remains) corrupt, arrogant and stupid.  He got caught stealing money from the city, and once he and his office were investigated Kwame racked up a list of felonies longer than - well, pretty long.

Although this isn't much more than a news item for most of the world, because if you don't live in Detroit you aren't affected, it's a train wreck of catastrophic proportions to others.  Keep reading for my take on it and my rant about it.

Martin - Zimmerman Verdict

Not guilty, yer honner.  Now can we call it a day?

I've been deliberately refraining from writing about the Zimmerman case, mainly because I tend to rant and rave a little too much about the injustice of the trial.  If you're really interested in learning a little more about the Zimmerman trial, here are four links that have very well written articles about the Zimmerman trial.

Albert's First Gun

Some of you may recall that I have a brother, Shotgun Bob, who is married to The Girl.  They now have a son, Albert.  You may read a very brief biography of each in the official cast of characters, or not as it amuses you to do so.

All that being the case, Albert was officially adopted by Shotgun Bob and The Girl in May of 2013, so Shotgun Bob thought it would be nice to give Albert a little 'welcome to the family' party.  I decided to give Albert a .22 rifle - cue the Moonbats!  Let me hear that wailing and gnashing of teeth!  Don't worry, The Ayatollah ObamaCare will cover your dental bill! - as I was saying, a .22 rifle as a sort of welcome gift.  Keep reading to learn about the rifle and the history behind it.

Origins Game Fair 2013 - Things to do, Things to Avoid (like the plague)

This is my final Origins post - what a relief, right?  Keep reading for my list of events to avoid and why, along with a review of events that are well run and a few tips on the Origins staff attitudes and standard operating procedure.

Origins Game Fair 2013 - Final Days

Friday and Saturday I destroyed the entire world twice.  In between times I played T&T, attended a lecture by Maxwell Alexander Drake and played several other games in the Boardroom.  Keep reading to learn about the good, the remarkable and the unusual.

Origins Game Fair 2013 - Thursday, We Play Arkham Horror

I was just getting out of a seminar when I got the call from Big Mike informing me tersely that the Arkham Horror event we wanted to attend was just upgraded and I should meet my two comrades at the official event registration area pronto.  Keep reading for an invaluable tip on event registration.

Origins Game Fair 2013 - Thursday, We Play and Review Leviathans

Last week Big Mike, California Dave and I attended the Origins Game Fair which I wrote about here, in Origins Game Fair 2013. There's good news and bad news about the next day, which we spent playing miniature and board games, including one game that was upgraded to pseudo V.I.P. status.  Keep reading to learn more than you'd ever want to know about a popular airship miniatures game and the further fumbling of the Origins staff.

Origins Game Fair 2013

I spent a week enjoying Big Mike's sterling hospitality in the company of my brother California Dave, and all three of us attended the Origins Game Fair in Columbus, Ohio.  Keep reading for an informative diatribe about the convention, including a few tips on the best way to navigate convention bureaucracy.

The Drowsy Chaperone at the Toledo Rep

The Drowsy Chaperone

Playing June 7-23, 2013 at:

The Toledo Repertoire Theatre

16 10th St.; Toledo, OH 43604

419-243-9277

My brother California Dave is in town for an extended visit (he'll be here until his attorney straightens out a few things in L.A.), and being in need of amusement I decided to take Mom and Dave to the latest Toledo Rep production, The Drowsy Chaperone.  This is possibly the best decision I'll make this month, and it's still early.

Right from the time you can hear the hinges creak and the deus ex machina drops in right up until the fat lady closes out the show and the aulaeum drops, you'll be entertained by a Broadway quality production.  Keep reading to get the particulars, without spoilers.

Crass Commercial Message: Take The Star Road

Standard Disclaimer: I'm not getting paid for this, unless Peter decides to pay me to take the post down.  Likewise with the review; I don't make a dime.

I enjoy reading the Bayou Renaissance Man, who is actually Peter Grant, a fifty something ex-military, ex-IT Office Slave and ex-sky pilot. A few years back he ditched Africa for the good old U.S. of A., got hitched and planted himself in Tennessee. Just why anyone would want to live in Tennessee, I couldn't tell you, but Peter and Shotgun Bob seem to enjoy it.

Peter writes well and has published his first novel on Amazon - Take The Star Road - which is, in the author's very own words, a story about how...

Nineteen-year-old Steve Maxwell just wants to get his feet on the star road to find a better homeworld. By facing down Lotus Tong thugs, he earns an opportunity to become a spacer apprentice on a merchant spaceship, leaving the corruption and crime of Earth behind. Sure, he needs to prove himself to an older, tight-knit crew, but how bad can it be if he keeps his head down and the decks clean? 

How bad? Bad. Because if it weren't there wouldn't be a story to tell.  See?

I don't know Peter, but judging from his blog I'd have something in common with him, and he's far enough to the right to appeal to me.  His writing is free from glaring grammatical errors and common word misusage, and although he lacks my own talent for the sardonic turning of a phrase, I guess you can't have everything.

I'm going to buy his book as soon as I publish this tiny contribution to the overall quality of the Internet, and when I've finished reading it I'll write a review.  Meantime, I'm encouraging everyone else to go buy a copy.  You won't be disappointed, but if you are then please, please write your comments on the back of a $20 bill and slip it into an envelope along with an SASE and send it along to Peter.  He'll move it right to the top of his things to do list.

Impossible Marriage at The Village Players Theater

I took Mom to see Impossible Marriage, a play written by Beth Henley.  This is a dramatic comedy set in the post civil war South, or more precisely set in the formal gardens of a Southern mansion that escaped General Sherman's efforts on urban renewal.  A family of Southern screwballs objects to the marriage of one relative, a true Georgia Peach to an unsuitable man from somewhere else - South of the Mason-Dixon line, of course.

I'd yawn and give this one two stars out of five if not for two items that stand out like a pair of timber wolves at the Westminster Kennel Club dog show.  Keep reading to get the low down on just why you might want to give this one a try, without spoilers.

Spring Flowers

I enjoy flowers.  I think my attraction has something to do with primitives and bright colors, but perhaps not. My Grandma Bourbon maintained several large flower gardens and had a penchant for roses, especially climbing rose vines.  The other day I was over at Main Lady's house and noted that last year's efforts, courtesy of Flopsy, Mopsy and Cottontail, are making the yard look very nice.

Good job, ladies.  Here's a tip of my fedora and a hoist of the morning bourbon glass to you for all your hard work.

Continue reading for photos of the flowers in the yard.  Click the photo to enlarge it.

Book Review: Confessions of an Erotic Masseuse

Confessions of an Erotic Masseuse

File Size: 271 KB
Publisher: Moonlight Press (April 18, 2013)
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
Language: English
ASIN: B00CFA8P1O

Ever wonder what goes on in a massage parlor?  No?  Well let me tell you, you don't know what you're missing.  Keep reading to find out why a man with my discriminating taste would recommend this to any adult who either has a relationship or is contemplating getting involved.

Question for an Outdoorsman

Anyone who is either an Boy Scout with the Wilderness Survival merit badge or anyone who has practical experience in at least one of the following areas: woodcraft, botany, arboriculture, floristics or dendrology, please take a look at the following pictures and tell me if this is poison ivy or not.

The rest of you have another drink and stop thinking about practical jokes.

Restaurant Review: Bar 145°

Bar 145°

5305 Monroe Street; Toledo, OH 43623

(419) 593-0073

Bar 145°

Regular Hours: 11:30am - 2:00am

Kitchen Hours: Mon - Thurs 11:30 - 10:00; Fri - Sat 11:30-11:00

Sun 10:00 - 9:00

Happy Hour: Mon - Fri 1:45 - 6:00

Having a preference for bourbon and wanting lunch in the very worst way, I stopped in at Bar 145° the other day in the hope of satisfying my appetites.  I've eaten there several times, and so decided to review the place.  Here's what to expect and why you might want to reconsider your options.

Gang War Heats Up

The gang war is heating up and The Blade is making the most of it.  Here's a quick look at the latest news from the Toledo Blade: Mayor calls Blade series ‘irresponsible’

Toledo Mayor Bell: Toledo does not have a gang problem...

Toledo Police Chief Diggs: Most of our problems are gangs...

Real good, guys.  Are these two actually on speaking terms?

Gang Map of Toledo

Toledo, OH.  When the current mayor of Toledo tossed the previous baby kisser into the gutter and remodeled the penthouse at One Government Center he promised to run a transparent government.  Given that I live next door in Sylvania Township I don't have a dog in this fight, but a recent tempest in this abandoned monument to greed, corruption and incompetence have distracted me from my regular duties of personal lawn growth quality care manager.

Bluntly, the local bird cage liner demanded that Toledo Chief of Police Derrick Diggs turn over a map of gang territories.  Chief Diggs declined to do so, and the flag dropped.  Keep reading to find out why both sides of this debate are behaving like idiots.

Weekend Road Trip - 4/6/2013

I've been writing about my weekend in Columbus and will finish up by writing about our dinner out and several other oddities.

Saturday night we went out to Barley's Ale House, which I've written about before in Barley's Ale House No. 2 and here, in Robert Burns Dinner in Review.  Keep reading as it amuses you to do so.

Columbus Gun Show 4/6/2013

I spent last weekend at Big Mike's place in Columbus.  While enjoying the excellent hospitality, we decided to attend the local gun show and see what might be for sale and needing a new home.  Moreover, Big Mike was on a mission.  Here's what we found.

Sporting Clays at Black Wing

I haven't been down to visit Big Mike lately, so when he proposed a weekend of shooting, drinking and other enjoyable pursuits I accepted his offer with enthusiasm.  As usual, Big Mike's hospitality is first rate.

The drive South to Columbus, Ohio was nothing if not boring for most of the trip, then exciting as soon as I hit I-270 and the Columbus traffic.  Let me be perfectly clear about this.  Any Columbus police officer who feels like writing a few traffic citations for such minor infractions as speeding, failure to maintain a safe distance (tailgating) and driving without due regard for safety need only spend five minutes patrolling I-270.  I don't know how long it takes to write a traffic citation, but I'm certain that an entire eight hour shift could be dedicated to pulling over the cretinous, inconsiderate, maladriot drivers that are making I-270 hazardous to everyone's health, including their own.

By Divine grace I arrived without incident Friday afternoon, and we took off for Black Wing intent on breaking a few clays.  I haven't been to Black Wing in a while, and they've changed their sporting clays course around a little. 

Big Mike and I played 50 birds, and I finally discovered just what was wrong with my game.

Restaurant News: The Hungry I

The Hungry I closed down.  There were several problems with The Hungry I, but the chief reason for closing was money and a lack thereof in the till.  I've been patronizing The Hungry I in spite of the problems I found inside, and while I'm still glad I did and I wouldn't do anything differently, Main Lady and I went to The Hungry I for the dancing and nothing else.

Donglegate Refuted

Practically everyone (even me) has heard something about donglegate by now.  For those of you who haven't sobered up enough in the past week or so to read the Internet news, I'll give you a quick rehash, after which I'll proceed to my very own personal rant.

Caution: Adult language and themes ahead.  Click at your own risk.

Wildlife in the Front Yard

I've always enjoyed the wildlife that we attract.  Mom puts out food in squirrel proof bird feeders, and then because she wanted to attract deer she started putting out corn - which the squirrels find to be quite tasty.  When a hawk showed up in the vicinity of the bird feeder, I offered to chase him off with a shotgun, but Mom wouldn't hear of it.

"They have to eat too, Jack.  After all, I never shot you for eating, did I?"

No, but when I turned 12 Dad installed a lock on the liquor cabinet and made a big deal out of it.  I guess he thought I was stealing his liquor.  I wasn't.  I was stealing Grandma Bourbon's liquor.

Anyway, I counted 14 squirrels at the corn the other day.  Word seems to get around and more squirrels show up all the time, and I fully expect that given the moral turpitude of the average squirrel, we should have a bumper crop by August.

Yesterday we had a brand new visitor, attracted by the squirrel population.

Another Toledo Landmark Passes Away

Sometime back I wrote about the old Yoko Health Spa out on Airport Highway.  You can read all about it in The Passing of a Toledo Landmark, but the long and short of it is that a little house of pleasure ill repute got bulldozed, and I'm sure the religiously righteous had a field day singing the Hallelujah Chorus while thumping their Bibles and praying for the souls of the well and truly damned who used to frequent that unholy establishment of sacrilegious joy.  The godforsaken truth is that the old Yoko spa had been there since Hector was a pup, and I'm sure that if the place was all that Pastor Pissfire Pallbox inculcated in his last sermon, the local constabulary would have closed it down years ago.  They didn't.
Now I've got some brand new news.  It's happened again, and another Toledo landmark has bit the dust.  Keep reading for the low down.

Latest News 3-9-2013

I haven't felt much like writing.  I'm still somewhat depressed and I think I may be coming down with a cold, which I really do not need just now.

R.I.P. Excellent Rachmaninoff

On Friday, February 22, 2013 at 6:30 PM Excellent Rachmaninoff was euthanized.  In attendance were Main Lady, Flopsy, Mopsy and me, Mad Jack.  Rocky passed away very peacefully while lying on Mopsy's lap.  He is missed by all of us.

Rocky 3/17/2011

The short of it is that Rocky stopped eating.  He'd drink his water, but he would often throw it back up again.  We gave him medication for nausea, so he didn't get dehydrated.  He just wouldn't eat.  On Friday Rocky had become too weak and disoriented to walk, so I had to carry him into the veterinarian's office.

I've written about Rachmaninoff in several places. You can read about how we found him here: Doggie in the Window. I miss him terribly.

The only downside to owning a dog is that you'll very likely outlive them.

Problems

I'm supposed to be doing a few productive things right now, and I'm having problems.  Writer's block, for one.  A desire to have a quick snort, for another.  Tell me, why are mothers so hard to raise?

The Fox on the Fairway at the Toledo Rep

Last Saturday night we went to see The Fox on the Fairway at the The Toledo Repertoire Theatre (16 10th St.; Toledo, OH 43604; (419) 243-9277).  I've always enjoyed live theater much more than film, to the point that even a poorly produced play is more enjoyable than a five star film.

Here is where I hear some theater company saying, "If only there were a few hundred thousand more like you, Mad Jack."  Sure thing, Virginia, and if there were the tickets in the front row at The Rep would be two-and-a-half bills each if you could get them, which you couldn't because the politburo fat heads would threaten the theater with building and fire inspections unless the city council and their inbred friends got the first five rows all to themselves on opening night.

Okay, I'm finished digressing.  Keep reading to learn my considered opinion about foxes, fairways and the latest play.

Martin Luther King Day (2013)

Happy Martin Luther King Day to everyone.  I decided to write a little about Dr. King because I was alive and well during the civil rights era (power to the people! right on!!) and mention a few odd facts guaranteed to drive every Moonbat within five miles into a watermelon dance.  Keep surfing if you have a thin skin.

Catch Up Time

Going back to Thanksgiving of 2012, here are a few highlights I've been too busy to write about.

R.I.P. Centenarian

Last Friday the medical experts who have been involved with Centenarian since October of 2011 predicted that she would be on the wrong side of the lawn by Monday.  I have a good deal more faith in the weatherman than I do these witchdoctors.

Happy New Year 2013!

This is the obligatory Happy New Year post.  So.


Happy New Year.

Christmas Catch Up

I haven't written much since whenever.  I've been busy and the holiday cheer has kept me safely depressed.  Sometime prior to Thanksgiving I discovered a recipe for eggnog that's a sure winner, and that I've published below the fold.  However, be warned.  I don't like Christmas – never did like it and likely never will – and I've included a sententious diatribe about Christmas which contains language and opinions that are unsuitable for children, fragile women and warm, sensitive men.

Keep reading if you're interested, continue to surf if you're not.

Restaurant Review:Grass Skirt Tiki Room

I was visiting Big Mike in Columbus last weekend, and when the clock was headed in the direction of happy hour Mike suggested we go and check out the latest edition to the Columbus restaurant scene: The Grass Skirt Tiki Room. I'm old enough to have experienced several Tiki restaurants and bars, so I was enthusiastically in favor of this selection. Here's what you'll find at the Grass Shack.

A few laughs

I haven't had much to laugh about lately, but that got fixed today.  Here's a couple funny stories for anyone interested.

Train Wreck

The old saying is that when it rains, it pours. I have a somewhat pithy rejoinder to that: Who says this is rain?

Foster Kids

Shotgun Bob and The Girl have acquired a new foster child whom I will name Albert.  This will be their third and very likely their last foster child.  The first foster child, Flounder (a large teenage female), became violent was returned to the system.  The next foster child, Feed Bag (an 8 year old boy with multiple problems involving his digestive tract in its entirety), was returned home to his mother by order of the State of Tennessee.  This is the same mother who tried to strangle him, thus putting Feed Bag into the system.  No, I'm not kidding.  Feed Bag arrived at Shotgun Bob's house with bruises around his neck from his certifiable mother and her methamphetamine dealing boyfriend.  The boyfriend may or may not be in jail, but the mother is now on anti-psychotic medication and therapy which makes her perfectly safe and fit to be a mother.  They say, anyway.  I'm keeping an eye on the Tennessee news.

Latest Centenarian News

I got the call around 11:00 this morning.  It was Main Lady, informing me that they are taking Centenarian off to Hospice.  Since Main Lady does not have both oars in the water, it falls to me, Mad Jack, to bring order out of chaos and catch Hell for doing so, then smile and reply, "Thank you Ma'am, may I have another?"

What else, right?  Well, I'll tell you, but first let me refer everyone to the official cast of characters so you can see who's on first, and let me also state right up front that you don't go to Hospice to get your chops cleaned.

Veteran's Day 2012

My grandfather served in World War I as a radio operator in the U.S. Navy.  Times were rough back then, and I remember him telling me that he didn't have a mattress to sleep on; only a bare board, but he thought it was pretty good.

My father served in World War II and was stationed in the Aleutian Islands on isolated duty.  He was there 18 months, 12 months longer than he was supposed to be in isolation.  By the time he got back the other men said he was beginning to act a little odd.

My Uncle Bud served in World War II with the OSS, helping to organize the French resistance.  He carried his pistol in his hat, and was captured by the Germans several times.  Bud never served time as a prisoner of war.

Another couple who lived in our neighborhood served in Allied Intelligence, and were offered citizenship in the United States for their efforts.  They changed their names when they accepted, and although she would never speak of what happened 'over there', he would tell a few stories now and then.  Not much, but a few.  The thing I remember was that both people were friendly, multilingual and very, very security conscious all their lives.

Realistically, if these people and a lot of others like them hadn't served in the United States armed forces, we wouldn't be bitching about our lousy government today.

Here's my salute to everyone who has served my country, and who is serving now.  My sincere thanks for your service.

I Hate Hamlet at the Toledo Rep

I enjoy the theater, and by that I mean live theater with real people on a real stage in real time.  Even the special effects are real.  I haven't been to the theater in quite a while, so when Main Lady suggested we go take in a play at The Toledo Repertoire Theatre (16 10th Street, Toledo, OH 43604 (419) 243-9277) I was up for it.  I haven't been to The Rep in years and I'd forgotten most of what I knew about the place.

The play I saw is I Hate Hamlet by Paul Rudnick - see also I Hit Hamlet - Behind the scenes at a Broadway fiasco by Paul Rudnick December 24, 2007 if you're insatiably curious.  Keep reading to get my opinion, then decide for yourself if you'd like to attend or stay home in the comfort of your living room with a good bottle of bourbon.

Cop Shooting - (ex) Officer Thomas White is Still Free

I've written about this case before, but until recently I haven't seen any news about the case.  Then I found something in The Toledo Blade the other day.

On May 23, 2009 in an act of cowardice, Ottawa Hills police officer Thomas White shot motorcyclist Michael McCloskey in the back, paralyzing him from the waist down.  Thomas White is completely unrepentant, as would be expected of any gang member shooting an innocent victim.  The victim shouldn't have been there, and that's all.

Hurricane Sandy

I've been in a hurricane before.  I actually went down to the beach to see what was up, and having seen what was what I returned to my apartment.  When I got up the next morning it was all over.  But, you see, that was in Jacksonville, Florida where people do not obey the State government's directives to evacuate.  Instead, they ride it out and then put up signs: You Loot, We Shoot.

My cousin 88 is in New York.  She's fine, and she's working from home.  I haven't talked to her about the storm news coverage very much, but I did get some second hand information from Uncle Sardonicus and Auntie Annie, who tell me that according to 88 everything's fine.  People are out going to work, no one is using the subway, the end of the world isn't here as yet.  Commercial news media reports train wrecks and ignores normal operation.

Out of all the coverage I've seen of Hurricane Sandy, here's the best graphic.  I have no idea who created this, but I'm giving the unknown artist full credit along with a hat tip and a hoist of the afternoon bourbon glass.

Mom in the ER

Just when things start to smooth out a little and I figure that the worst part of the highway is behind me, a rock grabs the oil pan.

Last Friday Mom complained about feeling dizzy, disoriented and generally weak all over and she hadn't been drinking.  No chest pains were involved, but between short discourses about settling the estate and the mess she'll be leaving me in ten minutes from now, I manage to get a coherent answer about taking a trip to the ER.

Off we go.

Range Report: Shooters of Maumee

Up until recently people in the Toledo metropolitan area had two choices for an indoor pistol range: Cleland's Outdoor World and The Bullet Stop.  That is no longer the case.

I'm happy to report that gun owners have another choice.  Shooters of Maumee is open for business, and the place is excellent.  Keep reading for a curmudgeonly run down on the facts, features and vicious rumors.

Many Happy Returns

I haven't had time or inclination to write much lately.  Mainly inclination.  I find the current political situation distasteful at best, nauseating the rest of the time.  I don't really believe that the election results will change my own situation at all, either immediately or in the future given that the difference between sixteen trillion dollars and thirty-two trillion dollars being purely imaginary, since there isn't that much wealth in the entire nation, even at today's inflated prices.

I failed to have a drink last night and I wanted one, which has thrown my mental state into a vague melancholy of the sort that is normally cured by a shot of the blues accompanied by a double shot of Gentleman Jack.  Red hot naked women are also a big help.

So.  Sixty years ago today at four in the morning my own dear mother woke my father out of a dead slumber to tell him it was time to go to the hospital.  Spurred by the completely untenable thought of Mom giving birth at home with only Dad to assist, the old sot hauled his pants and boots on, got Mom in one hand and her suitcase in the other and stuffed both in the car, then he high-balled it to the local hospital where the family sawbones was summoned by the staff in the emergency room.  Along about five or so I showed up.

Patriot Day

Today is Patriot Day, which should be a Federal holiday and is not.  On this day in 2001 my mom called me at Main Lady's house and told me we should turn the TV on.  We did, and Main Lady didn't get over her shock and sadness for a week.

Hindsight is always (almost always, anyway) 20/20, but in this case I think my criticisms are justified.  The United States of America had just been attacked by a cowardly group of religious fanatics.  Many people were murdered in this attack, and our government did not respond correctly.

Film Review: Bernie

Main Lady opted for pizza and a movie last night.  Naturally I was the one who got elected to pick out the movie, which means that if I get something I'd like to watch she'll whine that it's too violent for her and go out into the other room and sulk.  If I get something I think she would like to watch, it's guaranteed to be so boring that I may well fall asleep.  Then there will be a discussion of the film later on during which I'll encourage her to talk and keep my own opinions to myself.  This is more difficult that you might think, given that I'm supposed to have watched the film and been as enthralled by it as she is.

Anyway, I lucked out and rented the film Bernie, and I'm here to tell you that if you haven't seen Bernie, go rent it and watch the entire thing - and do not skip the credits.  The credits are the best part.  Keep reading for the links and lowdown, without spoilers.

Numbers and the Presidential Election

It happens every four years and it gets worse every single time.  Wake up, Mister and Mistress America!  You've got to run out and vote for the next President of the United States and a host of other issues, and remember - it is your very own Constitutional right to have a loud, uninformed and heavily biased opinion on everything.  Don't listen, don't read and for Heaven's sake, do not let the facts stand in the way of your feelings.

Before I decompose the rest of this rant, I want to issue a non-standard disclaimer, to wit: I am a long way from being a math major.  The results of very basic equations have always frightened me a little, particularly if I get a result that I didn't expect.  Having gone over the rough draft of this rant several times, I'm not certain that I'm right.  I am certain I need two fingers of bourbon before I go any further.